the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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