would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
