I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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