WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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