3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
