maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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