Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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