I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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