What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
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Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
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You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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