The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
