If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
