You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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