Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
