did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
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