Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
