just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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