oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
