I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize