My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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