after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
All I want is dick and wine.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize