Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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