Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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