I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
