she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
you win again, gameday.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize