I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
