Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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