Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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