You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
