I hate all girls vehemently.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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