i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
