paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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