Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
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