Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
only you would photoshop your dick
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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