ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen