they need to just BURY HIM!
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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