I love black thongs
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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