Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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