i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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