sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
