If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise