My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Where are you guys?
Drunk
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
