Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
