how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
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