their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
