She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize