Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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