I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
