I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
