You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
