I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize