Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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